Sandy shorts and lots of pictures

We got home last night from our trip to Gulf Shores. Everyone had a great time--especially Emmy Ruth. She loved the ocean!! She thought it was so very exciting. Of course we had to make sure to show Razorback love even if we were in the state of Roll Tide and War Eagle.

There were so many memorable moments during our visit, but the best for me was when we first went to the beach. Emmy immediatley walked to the sand and picked up a shell. Tara and I both look towards each other and said, "yep, she's got her YiaYia in her". It was a pretty special moment. We have, of course, saved Emmy's first shell, a broken blacken shell. I almost could feel Momma there with us as we enjoyed our fabulous trip. We ate at the Oyster House and when the kids got their picture made in the cutout there, I felt like she was there smiling. The beach is so special to us all.

Swingset--with slide!!!

Emmy got a swingset for her birthday from Aunt Cathy and Uncle Ted. This weekend, her daddy and grandpa put it together so it was waiting when she got home from Auntie B's and Neallios.

First, it's important to discuss slide safety with Dadoo.

We don't stand on the slide.

We don't slide down with the dog, Luke.We don't slide on our tummy.

And we don't walk back up the slide.
But we do say goodbye to the dog before we slide down.

And we have fun on the slide!!!

Have Dadoo ready to catch you!!!Get ready to do it again!Try out the swing.

And most importantly, thanking Dadoo!!!

Nothing better in the world...

...than this face, than this smile, than the giggle that goes with this picture. Many, many thanks to my friend Teresa. I never am not amazed at her work.

The nose--courtesy of her daddy.
The curls--all from her mama.
The priss--just like YiaYia.
The laugh--so much like Grandma Ruth.
The 'always on the go'--she gets that from Grandma Diann.

And Emmy puts them all together in the sweetest little package.

Broken hearted but oh so very blessed

Today was the third installment of cleaning out the house where I grew up so it can be sold to some other family. Some other family that will move in there thinking "this is a good starter home". I am sure that is what Momma and Daddy thought when they moved into 309 Crabb Lane. And then life happened. It happened a lot. Neall and I grew up there, they remodeled and it was suitable for our family. I remember looking at houses once when we were in high school and they decided to stay at our house. Then, we went to college and as Momma always said, her entire paycheck went to Neall and I. After we were moved out, they made adjustments to make it perfect for them. There were hardwood floors installed and new windows. There were gardening beds with cinder blocks on which to sit while tending to onions and strawberries. There was a deck that got a new look with big wide steps on the side instead of the small ones on the ends, new concrete poured for a patio and a side yard that became a flower bed. Momma's gardening technique was not so scientific--she just kind of threw things out there and they grew. There were frogs, lots of frogs, and the little statues of a girl and boy that reminded her of Neall and me.

And we got all of our memories out of there so that some other young family can create their own.

I brought home lots of things. Way more than I should have, but I just can't let go yet. There were so many things of Grandma Ruth's too. As I hung my "school days" bus frame with all of the school pictures of me from kindergarten to twelfth grade, I thought of Emmy and how I am going to have to use every single opportunity to tell her about her Yia Yia. Even if it is just her Yia Yia's baby picture in her play room, it's a chance to bring her up to Emmy. There was a picture that Aunt Ruby painted for me when I was little. It made me cry to think that here she is, on this earth, but Alzheimer's had made her as distant to me and Emmy as Grandma Ruth. It is so unfair for one little girl to have so few family members, but oh, how lucky is she to have the ones she has!

Not every little girl has an Auntie B and Uncle Neallio that want her. I don't have to ask them to keep her, but they WANT to have her stay with them. Mrs. Debbie came and picked Emmy and Solomon up today so that we could all work on the house and she WANTED to have Emmy with them. She loves her. Tara could not love Emmy any more than she does. LynnLynn sends Emmy adorable outfits with her name perfectly presented on them. Papa Richie loves her and snickers at her rantings and her ability to tell you exactly what a grizzly bear says. Momma's best friends love her--the aunts. She has Joy, she has Natalie, she has so many people that LOVE her.

She is a lucky girl. And we are a lucky family.

Signs....

The weekend I found out I was pregnant, Jorge had a dream that he was at our house and John was holding the most beautiful little girl, with bouncing blond curls. I decided to take another pregnancy test and it was positive. I say this because I really hope that Emmy doesn't get her uncle Jorge's clairvoyant skills.

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find several rubber ducks in the toilet. There was a Razorback duck and the bride and groom ducks. I hope this is not a sign that either my marriage or my beloved Hogs are going to be in the toilet soon. Also, it is a reminder that I need to me that I need to go buy one of those toilet seat baby proofing things.

The Girl and a Buddha

This picture was taken in July of 2007.

And this was taken in May of 2008.

I wonder what she will look like standing beside the Buddha when she is 27.

11:32 am

The plan for the day was to get to the zoo at 9 am. We arrived at 11:32. I wonder if it will ever get easier for us to get out of the house?? Emmy was most impressed with the polar bears, which is my favorite exhibit as well. We managed to see lots of the museum and plan to go back soon. Emmy's NayNay, aka Natalie, got her a membership for Christmas this year, and I must say that it was a fabulous gift. We are so grateful. Mama put some pickles in the cooler so they were good for a treat on a hot day.Could our Lucas be any happier to see the pandas????Trying to get a picture and Emmy has to get some kisses from Lucas....
And a picture of Lucas tickling Emmy in the panda hole...
Best Daddies.
Funniest animal there... yeah, you got Houston Nutt. Whoo hoo. Welcome to medicoracy. Oh, you're Ole Miss, you haven't been there. A very tired monkey. This duck heard that there were great opportunties at the Peabody for ducks and he is headed that way.

Letter from Heaven

I worked on the house in Wynne again this weekend and found this box.

The note reads, "I washed these Nov. 2000 & stored them for "who-whom" ever wants them. Love, Mom"

Best mom ever.

Her Daddy's Girl

I have mentioned before how Emmy Ruth will clap when she sees her daddy standing on the porch when we get home in the evenings. However, this morning, she might have surpassed even her best act yet to endear her to him. As we were driving to work, we turned around to see what all the ruckus in the backseat was and Emmy was about to come out of her carseat dancing and clapping to "Cold Gin" by KISS on the radio.

The smile on Dadoo was ear to ear.

Brain Cancer

I normally don't discuss current events, and believe me, it is hard to keep my mouth shut sometimes, but I also plan on using this to be a scrapbook for Emmy. As such, I think she should realize what was going on in the world when she was this age.

Gas is really expensive for us. It might be higher for her when she is buying, God help me even imagine her driving a car, but for us, it has increased a great deal. I am thrilled to find it for $3.60 a gallon.

And this week, Senator Ted Kennedy was diagnosed with a brain tumor. The fact that the doctors aren't telling the media about surgery but only radiation and chemotherapy leads one to believe that it is inoperable. Love him or hate him, no family deserves cancer. And from my experience, I can say that no family deserves this dreaded cancer.

The reports say that 9,000 people get the worst tumor--gliobastoma multiforme (which Momma had). I can't help but feel that number is really low. I think there are lots more out there that are misdiagnosed. A former coworker has been 'sick' since I met him in 2000. They diagnosed him with fibromialgia, chronic fatigue, even a discussion of MS, and only recently discovered a brain tumor--that had become a stage 4--glioblastoma. My uncle Richard was diagnosed after he fell when visiting his family in Colorado. Originally, it was thought to be his heart but after testing, the horrible news was discovered. Senator Kennedy was diagnosed after a seizure. It leads me to wonder how many people had tumors and died of other causes, a seizure made them fall into a lake and drown, made them have a fatal car accident or lead them to a manic state that they committed suicide.

In one moment, I think that no one shouted from the news when my sweet mother was diagnosed with a brain tumor. Fox News and CNN didn't show her friends crying at work or me almost passing out as I told my dearest friends the horrible news, and her life was just as important. But, maybe this dreaded diagnosis for him will help bring attention to this horrible cancer with patients that have no more hope for their cure than those who were diagnosed THIRTY YEARS AGO.

One day, this might be a disease that Emmy can know of as a disease of the past. And she can say that her YiaYia is smiling that no one else will have to suffer.

Downtown kids

Yard Sale

The yard sale was a smashing success--we now have some extra spending money for the beach! But, with help like this, was there any doubt that it would go well?

Fifteen months

It is going to be difficult, but I am really going to try to not say anything about how I can’t believe we are already here or how did time get by us so quickly. Oh, Emmy Ruth, you are a mess! This child is rotten and I just absolutely love it. She, on the other hand, just absolutely loves her daddy. Every day when we get in the car to go to work, John comes out after us and she claps when she sees him. The same thing in the evening when we get home, John comes to the car to get her out and she starts clapping and cheering for him. It’s hysterical.

Emmy still loves her Baby. All baby dolls. She carries them around the house and loves them and feeds them and rocks them. It is adorable to see. For the first time, John and I have seen something in here that she didn’t get from either of us: her love for the outdoors. John and I can agree that it is too hot for us to be outside, but not Emmy. Lucas got her a sand and water table for her birthday and she loves to play in the front yard with it. The other day, I brought lots of toys outside for her to play and she was beside herself with glee. The empty box, of course, was a favorite. John and his friend Victor were skateboarding in front of the house and she could not contain her excitement. When they would jump onto the sidewalk, Emmy would squeal and clap. I am going to have a talk with her and explain that she needs to not get quite so excited about the skateboarding boys yet, her day will come for that.
Unless we get really stingy and just want her to ourselves, Emmy is sleeping in her own big girl bed. It’s enough to just bring you to tears to see. This was on Mother’s Day after church—she was pooped! Notice all the stuffed animals that are strategically placed around her just to make sure she doesn’t fall off the bed. The sheets on her bed were mine when I was little; Grandma Jackson made a quilt and shams that match it as well. And the silky floral pillowcases were Grandma Ruth's. I like to keep a little something of old around for Emmy all the time in her room.She has a Hello Kitty iPod docking station in her room so that she can listen to lullabies as she goes to sleep. She loves to play with it and turn the music UP! REALLY! LOUD! and then she gets mad at me for taking it away from her to get it back to a tolerable level. I remember getting a lavender jambox for Christmas one year from Santa and being so excited and dancing to Lionel Richie at Grandma Ruth’s house when I was seven or so. A NewWave lavender jambox is a far cry from a Hello Kitty iPod docking station… I am terrified to see what else is coming…

I can’t believe that we are already here at fifteen months old and I can’t believe how the time got by us so quickly. Our sweet Emmy Ruth is growing by leaps and bounds. It must be all that milk.

Feliz Madre Dia

My Momma. What can I ever say about my momma that would ever do her justice? She was not perfect and I certainly never was. We fought a lot. A LOT! But she loved me dearly. I remember some of our lovelier fights. Once, I was determined to go to Lollapolooza and she and Daddy were worried about the vehicle we were taking. I knew they would be upset and when my friends showed up, I ran out to the car and waved bye to my parents on the porch--at 6am. It was not pleasant when I got home. Or the time that I snuck out with my friends and some boys and went to Memphis. We were supposed to spending that night at a friend's house and when we got busted, Momma came to pick me up in Vandale at 4am. It was not a nice ride home.

But she loved me. She might have not forgotten about the stupid stuff I had done, but she forgave me. I hope that I have the same gift with Emmy Ruth, she is her father's daughter so she is bound to get in to some trouble.

As I sit today and think of Momma here are some of the thoughts that flitter through my mind:

• Momma was a priss. She prissed everytime she walked. I do it too. And Emmy does it. It's quite funny.
• She danced. Not very well, mind you, but she always danced. Every time I see Emmy dance, I think it's momma giving her a kick in the tush to do it.
• She laughed. Not just laughs but good belly laughs. I once was in a wedding where the dress was absolutely horrific. Momma had to sit down on the floor to not pee on herself she was laughing so hard!
• Love. Love. Love. She loved Daddy; she loved Neall and I; she loved her brother, her nephew and her Christina and Jordan.
• Friends. When I think of how good my friends are to me, I only think back to how good of friends Momma had. It is an incredible thing for our sweet Emmy to see.

Today is a day to celebrate the miracle that is my sweet Emmy Ruth and to be thankful for the blessing that was Teri Grayson.

A smiling YiaYia

As we approach Mother's Day and I think of what a wonderful grandmother Momma would have been, I see the photos on Becca & Neall's blog and I know that she is smiling right now at our adorable monsters. Check them out at www.neallandbecca.blogspot.com.

AunTee Daycare

Emmy's sitter had to be off today and tomorrow so Tara so graciously volunteered to take two vacation days and keep Emmy Ruth for me. The morning mainly consisted of her sending me text messages of how cute these monsters are and then I got this picture. Of course it is grainy since it is taken with Tara's phone but if that just doesn't melt my heart, I can't imagine what might.

I went and had lunch with the crew and then they settled down for a three hour nap! Tara said that Lucas woke up and then went to kiss Emmy to wake her. Are you kidding me? Can I giggle at these two any more than I already do???

That's Doctor Auntie B to you

We are all so proud of Becca for graduating from Southern College of Optometry on Friday. Emmy and I attended the ceremony but due to someone's fabulous gift of gab, we spent practically the entire time in the hallway. I did sneak in and get to see Becca walk across the stage and get her diploma and Emmy waved like mad. Here is Emmy with Becca's cousin in the hallway (Martha and Laura Ruth had to bring Solomon out for a bit as well) and then Emmy in her first time out for throwing her sippy cup. We didn't get to stay after the ceremony to get pictures with Auntie B but we did manage to get lots of photos at the wedding.

We are so proud of our Doctors Jackson!!!

A happy, well-rested and well-fed girl

When we stayed in Batesville for the wedding this weekend, Emmy and Lucas shared a queen size bed. She did a great job and stayed in there all night. I have been trying to get her out of our bed for a while but have not been very successful in getting her into her crib. Apparently, she just didn't like the confinement. Saturday night, we put her to sleep in the full sized bed in her room and she slept until about 3 am when I got in bed with her. Sunday and last night, she slept in her full sized bed all night!!! When I go in there to wake her up, she is so happy and loves to look around her bedroom. Her room is so airy and light compared to our dark bedroom, I bet that it is a lot friendlier to sleepy eyes.

And she really likes pizza.

Wedding Bells

There are no words to say what it was like for me to see my father get married. So many emotions wildly flew through my mind but the most important one was the gratitude I have that Daddy and Linda are happy. We love Linda and are so thankful to see someone that makes Daddy so happy. Emmy and Solomon were absolutely adorable and I cannot imagine how I would have made it without the love of my sweet Emmy Ruth, my crazy John, my rock Tara, my roll Natalie, and my links to Momma, Pat and Jean, to name just a few. I am a very lucky daughter when I think of all the people that called to check on me, just because they knew this weekend would be so emotional. I am a very lucky friend, indeed.

Left alone for just a moment...

...and this is what I walk in to find.

Yard sale: life's memories, best offer

Today I feel completely selfish and stingy. I can't believe that I no longer have a parent living in Wynne. I am so very happy for Daddy and we absolutely love Linda and are so eager and ready to welcome her into our family on Saturday when they get married. It does sting to see him move from our home. To see all of the things that were accumulated over the years go to whomever wants them (or has room for them) and then on to the yard sale. It is as though that part of our lives has closed forever.

Ernest Hemingway was once challenged to write a story in six words. The result: "For sale: baby shoes, never used." It's rumored that Hemingway thought it was his greatest work, and it's invariably offered as the standard to which micro-fiction should aspire.

Yard sale: life's memories, best offer.

11:56 AM

Only a few hours to go until my little monkey girl is back in my arms. I am not sure why this time that she is away from me has been so hard. Maybe it's because all I have heard about since she left is how wonderful she has been and how funny and sweet she is. All of these things I have known about her but to hear them again makes me want to kiss her and hear her sweet little voice say all of those funny sounds. Five more hours!

Get Emmy home!

For our date night, John and I walked to do's, a sushi restaurant in our neighborhood. It was nice to not have to accomodate for a stroller but we spent a long time looking at each other as if, "what's strange about this scene?" We went home and spent a very romantic evening cleaning the basement afterwards. It is something we have needed to do for a long time, especially since John's idea of putting things away is to stand at the doorway and throw them into a room. I love that about him. The heavy rains caused the basement to flood as well so it was quite emotional for him to see vinyl records and other memories soaked and ruined (because they were piled on the floor). We filled up lots of bags of trash and John has sworn to never put anything down there again.

He only has to say that once for me! It's on to decorating the playroom down there now!!! And I will keep things tidy and up off the floor!

I absolutley cannot wait to get my little munchkin back into my arms. I feel naked and empty without her.

Strange night's sleep

Emmy is staying with Uncle Neallio, Auntie B and Solomon for two nights. I got home last night around 9pm after dropping her off with the intention of getting some things done around the house that I can't do with a tiny munchkin around. Of course, that didn't happen. I didn't even make it through Law & Order before I was out for the night. I guess that I slipped into some deep sleep that I have not had since I got pregnant since this morning, I overslept and I feel kind of loopy still.

The report from Wynne is that Emmy and Solomon are having a great time. Neall called last night and said that each baby was tied to a ceiling fan blade and the higher they ran the ceiling fan, the more they giggled. That's one funny uncle Emmy has. Tonight they are going to an event in Wynne and I made Neall promise to dress her in something adorable. I sent several dresses with her but I also sent some play clothes, so hopefully she won't be at this event wearing a "I listen to Slayer with my daddy" onesie. Fingers crossed.

TARA!

I swear that Emmy can be heard calling me "Tara" sometimes. John just looked at her last night and told her that no matter how hip we were, we weren't parents that were hip enough to let her call us by our first names.

Quick Emmy note and other stuff

We are trying to teach Emmy how to blow kisses to people and last night, she spent lots of time kissing her fingers. And that is it. Just kissing fingers and holding them to her mouth. Slowly, but surely, we will get it.

A lovely woman told me yesterday what a beautiful pregnant woman I am. I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't pregnant.

April begins the horror known as the Stanley Cup Playoffs. It's just so long. And the games are on every night. And every one will be on my TV. But little things like this make me giggle. Are Canadiens the same as Canadians??

New Car

On Monday, my Prius broke down on the way to work. I was pretty lucky that it died a few blocks from Emmy's babysitter's house so I just got the stroller out from the back and walked her to her sitter's house. My CEO lives only a few blocks away and since we are good friends, she came and waited with me on the tow truck. It took several hours and not only was I disappointed with the time but I was very upset with the reasoning of the dealership about my car dying. The reason they gave me was that the car was out of gas---but when I picked it up no one had put gas in it and it ran fine. Really, this was just a final straw since I was getting frustrated with how small the Prius was. Although I appreciated all of the perks of the car, I was pretty nervous with how I seemed to get blown away by the semi-trucks on the interstate every day. The recent heavy rains scared me when I was being thrown all over the road with the wind.
Never being one to take my time, I went looking for a car and bought one on Tuesday during my lunch hour. I love it! It is not great on mileage but I can fit our family and Tara, Jorge and Lucas, which is worth a lot. It's a white Chrysler Pacifica.

I do not use paper towels and I always use my canvas bags at the store so I feel like I am still doing my part for the environment without having to purchase carbon offsets.

Fourteen months

Are you kidding me that our girl is over fourteen months old already??? We were at the mall and shopping the sale racks the other day, seeing the 0-3 month clothes almost did me in, thinking of how my girl used to be too small for even those clothes at one point. Now, she is such a girl. A little girl, not a baby girl, but a little girl.

She is still not talking much and I am worried of course. Everyone tells me that I am crazy for being concerned. Not only is she brilliant already, but with her family history of me and her YiaYia, she will be certain to talk a LOT! I know this and I try to not worry too much but I can't help to be concerned that if I am not active, she will be behind all of her peers in school. That is the last thing that I want.

This month Emmy has just bloomed into a little lady. I can't tell how many times I have seen this girl run through the house in her diaper carrying a purse. She cracks me up with the purse! Such a little lady! She has started really playing with her toys as opposed to just having them around. Lucas and Emmy are always giving each other kisses and hugs and even thougth I try to hide it, it almost brings me to tears each and every time.

I told Emmy about our trip to Gulf Shores in June and she was distraught when I told her the trip was still six weeks away.

Bozo--The Afteryears

It's no wonder so many people have clown phobias. We worked on cleaning out the attic this weekend at Daddy's house in preperation for his move. There was lots of stuff and it was really dusty but it was good to get it out and start going through stuff. At some point, I finally have to say "enough is enough" and just stop looking at and examining every agonizing thing. It is tough to think of doing but I just can't have everything and it is heartwrenching to read every note and card. It's just too much.

I thought I had done an okay job during this but maybe not. I found that Saturday night and Sunday afternoon were tough days for me (and subsequentally tough for John as well!) but I am sure that I will get through it soon.

What I wouldn't do for just one picture of Momma and Emmy. Just one shared look between the two of them would melt my heart.

Flip Flops

This is a very important day in Emmy Ruth's life. She wore flip flops for the first time. We even trimmed her toenails (a pedicure if you will) last night in honor of the special occasion. Here she is at Wal-Mart showing off her toes to the nice lady in the fabric department.
I had this really cute sterling beaded necklace that was Momma's that I wore almost every day. I loved it and got so many compliments on it. This morning when I was taking Bill out for her daily constitutional, I felt all the beads go flying across the yard. It was pretty sad to think I can't wear that any more since I loved having a piece of her so close to me all the time.

Lovely weekend

Oh it was so nice this weekend! The weather was great and we had a big time outside almost the entire time. Emmy loves to be outside now and will stand at the door and point and cry to get out there. Saturday Lucas and Emmy played in her sand/water table for hours. NaNa got her some pink sand for Easter so they had a blast with that. Then on Sunday, Papa Richie came to visit, when he left, we went to the new playground in our neighborhood. Home Depot built a new playground behind Peabody Elementary School so it is really close for us to run to visit. We convinced NaNa and Dan to go with us and then went for a quick bite to eat at the Young Avenue Deli where Uncle Neallio stopped by for a quick visit.

Whew! A busy weekend for such a tiny girl.

Rain, Rain Go Away

It just keeps on raining. I write about this so that when Emmy is older and reading this recount of her life, I can tell her about the great floods of 2008. I drive over the bridge(s) four times a day--to West Memphis and back to work and then to West Memphis to pick Emmy up from the babysitter and then back home. I get a lot of quality time looking at that water and I can say that it is high. There are billboards that are now resting in water, street signs that are covered, walking trails that only have the tree tops that line the way showing. I really want to get out there and take some pictures of it and I am still going to try and do that, but, oh wait... it's still raining. Not really big on taking pictures in the rain.

The ground is so saturated that the basement has started to leak. This has only happened three times since we have lived in our house--a small price to pay for such a great space that we have. But, when it does happen, ugh!!!! I will try to get pictures of Emmy in her rainboots trying to do laundry tonight.

You know you are a greenie...

When the guy behind you in line at Whole Foods asks where you got your cool bag (my canvas shopping bag that reads “Paper or Plastic? Neither.”).

Wal-Mart. $1.

Life after tubes...

... is nice. Really nice. The Girl is babbling and babbling like there is no tomorrow. It is almost like a switch was flipped when she recovered from her surgery. She is still not saying a lot of words, but I am confident that will come in time.

However, the best thing about Post Tube Emmy is bathtime. The Girl hated baths. Hated them. It was a tortoruous event every time we took a bath, to the point that she rarely got one. I know, it is awful, but she was beside herself. I would try to give her a bath every night in hopes that she would just get used to it but that didn't help. Now, I realieze that she hated baths so badly because her ears hurt when they got wet. Even if we didn't wash her hair, she would scream, just from fear of getting water in her ears. Now, she has to wear ear plugs every time we get in the tub. She splashes and she laughes and actually cried last night when I got her OUT of the tub! Amazing stuff.